20 Questions with... A newly wed bride
Today I am talking with a long time friend and newly wed bride, Alex. She tells us all about their wedding day, what (if anything) she'd change, and answers the question on everybody's mind - cake or cheese?
Well hello there Alex! Thanks for sharing your story. So, tell us a little bit about yourself and your partner.
Hello to you too! My name is Alex, and my partners name is Rama. I’m 30 years old and work in administration while studying a Bachelor of Arts majoring in Gender Studies and Sociology part time. Rama is 29 and studies full time and is currently completing his honours year in Psychology.
And how long have you been together?
We met in September 2010, so it’s coming up to 7 years together now.
When did you first know you were in love?
I can’t 100% remember, is that bad?! The feeling of love and dedication was definitely cemented when my Dad passed away less than 6 months after we had been together. I couldn’t have gotten through that time without Rama. I just asked Rama when he knew and he said the morning after we met, when we were hanging out, talking and laughing was when he realised he really liked me (naww!).
Who proposed to who?
Rama had always said that after 5 years of us being together he would propose! So, he proposed to me on our 5-year anniversary. I had put together a photo album of the past 5 years we’d spent together, and gave that to him as a gift, and his anniversary gift to me was a slideshow of all our photos. At the end of the slideshow, which Rama tried to time out but it ended up going for a lot longer than he thought it would, there was a slide that said ‘Will You Marry Me?!’ and I cried and cried then said yes.
And when did you get married?
26 November 2016
Tell us a little bit about your wedding day… And what was your wedding ceremony like?
The wedding day was so much fun! We got married at a pub in Newport, the ceremony was held in the beer garden, and guests could then just walk a few steps to the function space for the reception. We wanted our ceremony to be short and sweet and to reflect us as a couple. I came in to ‘Into My Arms’ by Nick Cave. I thought at that point that I would have broken down into a blubbering mess, but there was so much else to think about that I didn’t. We wrote our own vows, and showed them to one another beforehand, on our anniversary in September. We wanted to pre-empt the tears, and make sure our vows aligned. It was really special to read them aloud to one another in private before the big day.
How long did it take you to plan your wedding?
We were engaged for just over a year, so we spent most of that time planning. I’m a planner by nature so I really enjoyed planning.
And what was your favourite thing about your wedding?
Well, apart from marrying my best friend, I loved having all the people that we love in one room together. And dancing. Wedding dancing is the best dancing, especially when we can dance around in your fancy wedding dress!
What wedding traditions did you keep?
We had wedding rings, cake, white dress. Our bridal party was a mix of men and women on both sides which is less traditional. My Mum and brothers walked me down the aisle but I was sure to tell them they weren’t giving me away but showing their support.
What was your wedding style / theme?
I don’t know what you’d call the theme to be honest! It was a mish mash of all the things we liked the look of, bright florals, pretty lace, green foliage.
What was your favourite part of your wedding ceremony?
Holding Rama’s hand the whole time and reading our vows to one another.
Is there anything that you would have changed about the day?
In retrospect we both would have loved to have gotten ready together, and walked in together on the day. It was difficult being apart from one another before such a huge event. Also, if money wasn’t an issue we would have loved to have had the whole thing on video.
What did you spend the most money on?
Food and booze!
What’s been your favourite, unexpected thing about being married?
There’s nothing we can really think of!!
If you were to get married again, what would you spend less time/stress/money on?
I would spend less time worrying about what we were supposed to do, in terms of traditions and pleasing other people. I would have listened to Rama’s advice a lot sooner, which was that at the end of the day the most important thing is that we are both there, everything else is secondary.
What was the best piece of advice that you got given before your wedding?
The best advice we were given was to set a time, tell someone about that time, and get them to tap you both on the shoulder as a reminder. Then remove yourselves from the party for 10 minutes or so and spend some time alone and reflect on all the awesomeness that is happening around you.
What advice do you have for a couple who are about to get hitched?
Being organised is good, because it means you have less to worry about on the day. But at the same time, the day is all about you both, so even if things go wrong the people around you will manage it and (hopefully) you will be none the wiser! Also, if you don’t have a professional filming the day, ask a friend to film the speeches on their phone or something. I wish we could listen to the speeches again.
How did you choose what your last names would be post wedding?
We discussed this pretty early on, even floated the idea of combining our surnames, or creating our own but in the end we decided to keep our own.
What are your views on marriage equality in Australia?
Make it happen!
And finally, cake or cheese?
Rama says cake, I say cheese…..
Photographer: Chelsea Dennison / Joan Fawcett
Flowers + styling: Wildflower Events Co
Dress: Handmade by one of Alex's amazing bridesmates, Grace Adams